Moving On, Looking Backwards

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Moving On, Looking Backwards

Folks who have  been following the story of Nico's acceptance of Benny as pack member and yard buddy have expressed real delight at the picture of my three boys together in the house.  Barring radical and unlikely changes in temperament as Benny matures I think we can say we have achieved integration!  Benny came here in September, so it took about three and half months. I underscore this because when we first talked about getting a male puppy for our pack not everyone we talked to encouraged it.  "Sending  a male Malamutes into a pet- home where there is another male Malamute is a mistake," one individual told us.  There is good reason for this.  Every now and then you see it on the Rescue lists:  Young male Malamute needs new home. Failed to get along with resident senior male."   

"You should get a female" we were told, and indeed we did look for a young female in rescue. None were to be found at that time and so we started considering other options.  Meanwhile I couldn't help but think, we have two male Malamutes already. Nico has shown that he can be domineering over females as well as males, frightening them so they dont' want to be with him.  I'm not sure gender makes the difference. 

Perhaps what has always persuaded me that Malamutes can and should be able to get along is the fact that, as sled dogs, they have to be able to run together.  I watched videos of Benny's breeder running 12  dog teams, all Malamutes.  I found myself thinking, "O.k.: one male, one female -- what sex then are the other ten that they get along so well?"  The key of course is positive leadership and respect for pack hierarchy as well for the individual value of each unique member. 

Dogs in general are pack animals, and Malamutes are supremely pack-social.  Dogs can and do get along together.  However, just as young children cannot always be expected to throw their arms around each other and embrace the possibilities of friendship, so dogs, and especially Malamutes, need time to evolve into acceptance and appreciation of a new addition.

When I compare our dogs to young children I am thinking of the age before a child has learned any of the social graces that allow them to say , "Hi, how are you," even if they are thinking, "I want you to leave because I don't want to have to share my toys."  I am also thinking of children so young that they are genuinely afraid of new things, including other children.   Possessive selfishness, territorialism and fear are all instinctive reactions to intrusion.  At the same time behaviors meant to help social creatures like humans and canines get along are also hard wired.  We saw this in Benny's behavior from the first day he came here.  The play bow, averting his eyes, rolling over and exposing the most vulnerable parts of his anatomy  to the senior dogs are things that come natural to any puppy.

As with children, its what comes next that takes a bit of training and a lot of time.  In Thunder's case we didn't have to do much. He grew up with another male Malamute, lived with him for the first four years of his life, and was trained as a sled dog to get along as a part of  multiple dog teams.  The positive handling he received from his first family  is obvious from the way he behaves with us. These learning experiences are comparable to the schooling in socialization a well-raised child receives. Thunder  has a steadiness of temperament that allows him to accept with equanimity just about anything that doesn't directly effect him, the confidence to believe he can successfully thwart anything troublesome that does, and the social skills to communicate what is and is not acceptable without  having to get serious with his teeth. If Benny bothers him, he growls. Benny, being Mal-smart, immediately backs away, lies down, does whatever is required to appease. What he does next is get up and walk around like nothing has happened, being careful to keep respectful distance. What he does not do, a did not do when he was smaller and more vulnerable, is show the weakness that can make a Malamute think a whimpering dog is prey.

Benny is like a young child who has never known mistreatment, spending his early formative period  with others like him, both children and grown-ups. He has no reason to fear, and knows by example and practice what to expect, how to behave.  Thunder, similarly is like any other grown up whose childhood  was spent in the security of a loving family, whose social judgement  suffers from  no lack of self confidence, and therefore can afford to exercise the restraint necessary to getting along with others.

Nico on the other hand had a rough start that has left him with a nervous temperament and a lack of confidence.  The signs of this remain in evidence even now when he is stressed by change and new things.  Benny's arrival set off Nico's intruder alert mechanisms.  The new puppy's entry into our home confused  him.   further.  We can only speculate on what goes on in any animal's  mind, but we could see by his agitation and regression to nervous behaviors that he was uncertain about what he was supposed to do now.  These behaviors for the most part had to do with excessive and more aggressive mouthing, stealing and running away with things, chewing on  his leash, being skittish and difficult when it came time to put on leashes for walks.

For me the learning here is all about time: Nico has taught me so much about taking time to watch and wait and listen and learn from our dogs.  He's been doing this now for three years.  Many times when I have been exasperated by his nervous refusal to come in when loose, or watching him run in crazy circles in the house chewing a new glove and  swallowing at the slightest sign of interference, and, these last few months, having to take Benny out of the yard because he was running him just too hard and too fast with no regard for the puppy's need to stop.  In moments of frustration, I  confess to thinking it may not be  too much for him, but maybe its all too much for me.  And yet, every single time, when I finally figure it out he and he gives up the glove, comes close  and of his own volition puts his head into the collar for a leash walk, and finally, lately, takes a couple of steps back from Benny and then lies down beside him in companionable peace and quiet,  my heart soars.  It is as though the whole discordant orchestra suddenly gets it all in tune at once, and plays the final resolving chord with one great contented sigh that makes everything that came before make sense.  

Nico came to us scared and lonely.  He made up to Thunder right away.  Being with that grand old man he found the certain companionship of a dog who knew how to be himself an ease that in time he was able to transfer to himself, and then to his being with us.  As fear receded he showed himself as a playful dog who liked to run and romp and enjoyed the energy of other dogs. His excitement however remained driven by a kind of nervousness that annoyed and then frightened the other dogs who came to play. Playtime with visitors ended, and soon Nico had only us and Thunder, none of whom could keep up with him, much less outrun him in play.  Nothing makes me happier then, to see Nico and Benny ripping around the yard, chasing toys and each other, and then watching them wrestle in that heart stopping way that ends when I call out and Benny stands up as if to say, "Hey Nico: let's get some cookies!"  

I don't know why it matters so much to me to see Nico lead a complete "dog-life," but it does.  He has a gentle sweet nature that manifests itself when he is relaxed and secure.  He likes to lie by my side when I write. If I am agitated he comes a presses his head against my hands telling me "I'm here. Nothing else matters."  On the nights when its his turn to sleep inside he gets up on the bed in the morning and pushes against my legs as if to say "I'm here. I don't want a hug, but I want to be closer to you."  He relies on us to keep human danger at bay while proving absolutely fearless in the woods when the chance to chase a bear presents itself. He has done heroic things for me, dragging me home on the skis choosing the easiest route when I'd gotten a stick in my eye and could not see for the pain and the brightness of the sun-ridden snow, being among the more dramatic.  He rescues me every day  from indolence by insisting on long walks despite hours of  exuberant play in the yard with Benny.   He is my golden Mal, my sunshine dog. He makes me happy. He and Benny make each other happy, and that becomes an exponential escalation.

Beethoven had this habit in his symphonies of ending movements with repeated chords, the same chord, over and over.  I understand why he did that. Malamutes, and artists like Beethoven, live every day with an intensity that others might find exhausting.  When resolution finally arrives, once is not enough. Reiteration   relaxes and then generates a renewal of rhythmic energy that resonates long after the final chord finally dies away and probably launches the next musical idea for yet another day's symphonic outpouring.

That to me is Malamute, that to me is the constant renewal of joy that comes from taking the time for a dog like Nico.